Mothers and Martyrs
Motherhood can be both a rewarding and challenging experience. People try to tell you about all of the ups and downs, sometimes making strong arguments against the endeavour and yet something still compels us to embark on this journey, for no doubt we feel there is something of great value to be garnered from the experience.
Just like all the people we encounter in our lives, the relationships with our children can point to our own inner struggles. Childhood wounds and traumas may surface and cycles experienced in childhood are often repeated by people without their even realising it. These maternal legacies being passed down from one generation to the next. Women everywhere can be seen sacrificing themselves, silencing their own inner voice and neglecting their own needs. At times, the children becoming the sole focus of their lives. Their duty bound lives often leading to sacrifices in career, finances, relationships and their own personal ambitions.
What often happens in life is that people set out knowing what they did not like in their own childhoods and are determined not to repeat the mistakes of those before them. These legacies are not limited merely to mothers, or even parents, they are present in all kinds of relationships. What inadvertently happens is that people unknowingly begin to repeat the same patterns until their present lives become a mirror image of what they had experienced in their pasts. People often make attempts to correct this in their lives but they do so by changing the triggers, like relationships or their jobs. Because they do not look at the underlying cause of their problems they are destined to repeat the same patterns over and over again.
The characters, the settings and even the stories may be slightly different but the themes will all be the same.
It is like the great karmic loop. Karma is not a bad thing in my view. It is not a punishment. It is merely a cycle that repeats until we break it. Just as if we break the small cycles in our everyday lives by being able to identify them and change our beliefs and therefore actions around them we then cease to experience the same situations. This is also the case on the scale of our lives from one incarnation to the next. If we do not learn what we need to in one lifetime we simply come back and experience those lessons again in the next. Just like in this life the characters may change such as that which happens when we change partners or jobs, the characters of our next life will change but the themes will be the same. It is only when one is able to look at their life, to face it head on and to see these patterns for what they are and what actually caused them, that they can finally be broken releasing one from their bonds.
We can choose to see these things as blessings because they are there to help us to see where we have blockages in our psyche that stop us from living more fulfilled lives. Once they are identified it is much easier to change our beliefs around them and therefore our actions. We change, and because we change, we no longer align with the same things. This is when things that no longer resonate with us fade naturally or are removed from our lives, or something new enters that is exactly what we wanted or needed.
These experiences however negative they may seem, are not there to hurt, they are there to teach. All of the people we encounter in life, be it our mothers, our children, our fathers, our teachers, the man at the counter of a corner store, they are all our teachers. It is thanks to the interactions with them that we learn what we need to about ourselves and it is when we allow ourselves to learn that we raise our consciousness and are able to break these generational curses and to release ourselves from these self built prisons. In turn becoming better versions of ourselves, living more authentic and satisfying lives that not only benefit us but those around us as well.
With love
Basia ❤️
